Buffering...



Does your phone or computer ever buffer?

You know that little circle just keeps turning and you keep waiting.

It can be a little frustrating at times, especially when it takes forever and nothing loads.

Sometimes I buffer too.  In fact most of us do, and it isn't really good for us.

As far as humans are concerned, buffering is what we do to avoid pain or a negative emotion.  When we are sad and we eat all the sugary foods.  When we are stressed and we veg out in front of the TV for hours.  When we are lonely and we scroll through Facebook half of the day. 

These are all forms of buffering.

Does it matter?  Probably. 

If we buffer so much that we aren't able to stay present with our life and work through the emotions we are feeling, it can stifle our growth and cause us to become stuck in a place of suffering.

Buffering or avoiding emotion does not make our negative emotions go away, it just makes us not see or feel them for a time. Unfortunately, we feel worse after the buffering than we did before.

When we stop buffering we will experience temporary pain, but we are also able to stay present in our lives long enough to identify the root of the pain and find solutions.

When we stop buffering, we also start living the truth of our lives.

I'm still working on cutting out the buffering in my life and it isn't easy, but I'm gonna keep trying.

What would your life look like if you gave up buffering? 






Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Even the Bishop Needs Help Sometimes!

Image
We all need help. ALL of us find ourselves in need at some point. Have you ever wanted to seek help, but felt ashamed or embarrassed to talk to someone?  I have found these feelings to be especially prevalent when talking about marriage and intimacy.  Aren’t these things just supposed to naturally work themselves out?...not usually. Listen to this bishop’s story prior to seeking help. “Sex had been a disaster from the beginning of the marriage.  What made it worse was he felt that good Latter-day Saints shouldn’t have such problems.  He believed that if anyone should have a model marriage, the bishop and his wife should.  In fact, virtually everyone in the ward assumed they were the perfect couple, and he felt both hypocritical and a little bitter that the image was false.” In frustration, the bishop said, “Show me the justice of it.  We keep all the commandments.  We pay a full tithe and a lot more.  Neither of us has ever refused a calling.  We attend the temple regula
Read more

How to Talk to Your Husband About Intimacy

Image
What comes to mind when you think about talking to your husband about physical intimacy? It seems logical that we should talk about something so vital to our relationship, but for many women it also seems scary. Maybe you can relate... “It feels so awkward to talk about it.” “Every time we try to talk about it, it ends up in a fight.” “I don’t know how to express what I really feel inside. “If we talk about it, he’ll try to talk me into things I don’t feel like doing.” It might not be easy to start talking, but it can heal your soul when you start connecting on this level.   Expect it to feel uncomfortable at first, but do it anyway…because you deserve a happy marriage.   Here are my best tips to guide you through it! 1- Practice acceptance of each other first.   When both partners feel accepted by each other and are comfortable sharing non-intimate feelings, they are more open to sharing the more vulnerable parts of desire.   2- Choose
Read more

Would You Want to Talk to You?

Image
Tonight,  I was summoned to my bedroom.  One of my boys was there surrounded by broken glass.  I'm telling you guys, there was glass everywhere!  In my bed, in the laundry baskets, in my jacket, between my books, buried in the long pile carpet. You get the picture.  I could tell he was nervous and afraid to speak.  Finally he told me he was responsible for the broken glass.  He was still afraid to give the details.  I won't lie, my tired body was fighting back anger and my frustrations were running deep.  Somehow I mustered the ability to say, "It's OK buddy, accidents happen.  Let's just get this cleaned up." After the words come out of my mouth, I instantly saw him soften.  He went on to explain that he was swinging the couch pillows and accidently hit the lights.  He hurried to get the vacuum and stayed by my side until we cleaned up all the glass we could find.   As we were cleaning I thought about how the situation might have been different if
Read more